Blow Up The Outside World: How God Transforms Pain Into Redemption 

by Donavon L Riley 

In the library of memories that are all that remain of my youth, there are many volumes torn to shreds by past explosions of anger and pain. Explosions that spilled out as fits of rage towards an unfair, unjust world. A troubled soul, I lashed out, attempting to force others to carry the weight of my self-loathing that was sculpted by abuse, self-harm, violence, and a relentless fight against anyone who crossed my path. But as the years have passed, and the broken bones, scars, and persistent injuries have forced me to become more self-reflective, I can see a changed man. It’s a conversion that can only be attributed to the unfathomable power of God’s redemption through Jesus Christ.

In my younger days, I was a walking powder keg, my fuse burning shorter by the day. Abuse had molded me into a creature of rage and violence, and I felt the need to retaliate against the world that had inflicted such pain upon me. I turned to self-harm, thinking that the physical pain could somehow numb the emotional turmoil inside. I engaged in fights, harming others in an attempt to quell the maelstrom within me.

My life was a never-ending battle, and I was determined to fight it alone. The world had taught me to be ruthless, to trust no one, and to rely solely on myself. I was a soldier of chaos, waging war on everything and everyone.

But then, in the darkest hour of my existence, when I accepted that death was inevitable, a glimmer of light appeared. It was God’s grace, a divine intervention that I could neither understand nor deserve. It started with a simple revelation: I was not alone. In my solitude, God was there, patiently but firmly leading me to turn toward Him for rescue.

As I cried out to Him, I began to acknowledge how God was using my pain and trauma for a purpose far greater than I could comprehend. Like a skilled blacksmith forging a blade from raw iron, God was shaping me through the fires of my own suffering. He was using my past to mold me into a witness to His power of redemption.

The path to redemption was neither swift nor easy. It required a profound surrender that I couldn’t do on my own, a letting go of my old self that required God to kill the man that I was, and an acceptance of God’s grace that only came through his giving me new life. He confronted the darkness within me and compelled me to acknowledge the harm I had caused others. It was a painful process, as God went to work tearing down the fortress I had built around my heart.

But God’s redemption is relentless, like the waves of an unyielding sea crashing against the shore. His forgiveness and mercy washed over me, cleansing me of my sins, and granting me a new life. I found sobriety, a newfound clarity that allowed me to see the world through different eyes. I was no longer the storm; I had become the calm in the eye of the storm.

Through the redemption delivered by Jesus Christ, I discovered a love that transcends human understanding. It was a love that forgave my past and offered me a future filled with hope and purpose. My scars, once artifacts of pain, became testimonies of God’s healing touch.

And so, today, I stand as a witness to the transformative power of God’s redemption. My life is a living testament to his grace, a story of how God can take the most broken, dead-man-walking kind of life and breathe new life into them. I am not the man I once was. I have been reborn, a vessel of God’s love and mercy.

So I invite you to reflect on your own life. We all carry scars, broken bones that never healed right, wounds that never seemed to scab over, open wounds inflicted upon us by a hopeless, dying world. But know this: God can use your pain and your past for his purpose. He can turn your chaos into redemption, your darkness into light. Just as he did for me, he offers you a chance for a new beginning, a life filled with hope and the promise of eternal love.

So, let’s blow up the outside world—the world that tells us we are defined by our past, by our pain, by our rage, and by our failures—and embrace the transformative power of God’s redemption In Jesus Christ. In him, we find our true identity, our purpose, and our peace.