Quiet night for me at the moment and its because I’m away from the walls and the darkness, yet I know that outside this protection, nightly come the madmen who’d like to breach right through. From the walls comes the crackling sound of gunfire which puts them down into an earthy rest, a place none would rather be. And the security holds the place together while I listen to my I-pod and play some tunes quietly. Earlier this evening twisting plumes of smoke rose upon the tall flames which birthed them and I could make out the high fires growing in the distance. Near enough to see, near enough to touch, just like taking a walk to a corner shop. But I’d be getting ash and fire rather than milk and eggs and then I’d hear the ‘pop, pop, pop…’
Funny. How a man can stand tiptoe on a high stairwell and still only have a shortened view into the greater distance. A child’s eye view into his future. I stood silently on the highest rooftop and leaned upon the second railing, thinking, how beautiful it is, the nightfall that’s coming. I just didn’t know what surprise was waiting for me but I felt elation…for what was waiting for me…
…and I couldn’t predict if I was asked…
whether tomorrow I’d have peace or misery.
But, I felt that no matter what occurred, I’d do just fine.
And I felt, that I’d never want to see the future, never want to know exactly what was unfurling upon me… And if all I was ever given was a secret grief, I would be fine. I would be fine. This shortened view from my heightened place brought me a vision that I hadn’t had before. And out along the wide expanse of the hot horizon, where the heat waves blew the sky silly, I saw past the ripples which moments earlier had blocked my view. And I knew I wanted to embrace the life that was wrapping itself around me. I will be fine. I will be fine. I will be fine…
pic from weblogs.chicagotribune.com